Saturday 26 February 2011

The week that was

What a whirlwind of a week it has been! starting last Friday with BBC look north contacting me  so they could do some news coverage, then signed with North East Press so they could look at a publication deal this resulted in Pick me up wanting to do a follow up on the story. This has also resulted in me being in the Sunderland local paper as well,

In between all of this have tried to live a normal day to day existence. Nothing been sorted at work yet so still no idea what is happening regarding me training some one else up or the VPN network being set up so that I can work from home afterwards. Still nothing on the sick pay side either . Although getting to work Thursday was very interesting with the amount of pain I was in ,now you are probably wondering why I went to work if the pain was that bad, I know David was LOL. It was all self inflicted . Had the day off for Davids birthday on Wednesday and Paul looked after the kids for us (well more like the little ones nearly finished him off and the eldest looked after him ) so that we could have a kid free day out to Newcastle shopping. First time in 7 years we have been able to do this !!
Had a great time even discovered a way of tackling escalators for the first time, makes life so much easier then using the lifts let me tell you, although David had to steady me getting on and off and still haven't worked out going down on the damn things, knowing my luck I will just have it sorted in time for the legs to come off !!
The moral of the story was I over did it a tad with the walking and standing and by the time we sat down to eat at tea time I wasn't sure if I would be able to get up again . The pain was intense!! the heel pad on my left stump felt like it was in fire as every time I tried to put weight down on it it felt like it was bathed in fire and the worse thing was  I  hadn't took out any painkillers and had to stand on the Metro home. Not one person would make eye contact with me or give me a seat even though my prosthetics where on show...charming or what.
The upshot was come Thursday morning I couldn't walk but couldn't afford to take the time off work and we where on a deadline with the new leads we had so had to painkiller up and take my elbow crutches with me I was an hour late and what would normally be a 10 min walk for me (everyone else 3 mins), ended up being a 20 min shuffle like the living dead up Granger Street.

Vouchers turned up for "fat" club so hoping I can get there on Thursday, Pilate's and Thia Chi going well and its starting to get easier as well, not looking so much like a beached whale any more when trying to do it but still looking like a fish when I  am floundering  around on the bed trying to get up. Weight loss not so well 17st 10 but the body fat has dropped considerably  to 45.7% so yeah me !!! Starting to fit into clothes that I havnt been able to wear in a while.

Still nothing from the hospital. Thinking of ringing the secretary to see if she can tell me anything. Really starting to get down about it all now, finding it hard to stay positive and look on the bright side.  There seems to be no light at the end of the tunnel.  David is staying up beat, keeps telling me to look at how well am doing with the exercise and how much of an inspiration I am to other people in the same situation, how we are keeping our head above water and how much good am doing for amputees in helping other people understand.  Which is good, but wheres my light at the end of the tunnel?
Need to sort something out to look forward too, before the "blues" that I have now spiral out of control and end up in full blown depression.  The comfort eating , or wanting too is killing me and finding it hard not to succumb every two minutes !! The temper is starting to get shorter which is not good as am finding my self taking it out on the kids and David, which isn't fair as the kids not only dont deserve it but dont understand why mam is like that..
Taking all the vitamins just hope there doing some good .  On Sea Kelp for the Thyroid, Omega 3 for skin hair nails ,Echinacea Root for my immune system (trying to build it up before I go in ) and Glucosamine Sulphate for my joints..
Knee abrasions are getting worse using E45 on them but not very effective so need to look into finding something else that works. David thinks that when the appointment comes through we should contact some one and see if any one wants to do a documentary on the amputation its self...would any one even be interested??
Just wish the damn thing would come....

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