So how do you prepare for something like getting your legs chopped off? I have no idea!
Depression hit me really bad over the last few weeks, things basically just getting on top of me and all the little things seemed to be a lot worse then they actually where. None of it stemmed directly from going in for the amputation, but I suppose it influenced them in directly. Its hard to plan ahead for after something like this and I was trying to put things in place for after it had all happened which you really cant do because you can not predict how things are going to go or turn out.
I wanted to have something to look forward too but until I return to work , which obviously I don't know when that will be, I cant book anything for holidays as we don't know how finances are going to work out or even if the dates we book are going to be realistic for my rehab.
So after lots of talking things through with David, who is being very supported, I have managed to put things into perspective. The major issue is money & work. That is the base of the matter.So trying to tackle those two things head on . Kind of got them sorted. Have put holidays into work 2 weeks before I go into hospital so I can have some time with the family. Starting to tie things up at work ready for going in, but this is creating a lot of pressure because as well as tieing things up I still need to do the job am being paid for. I now know that my employer will pay SSP while am on the sick but that isn't a lot to live on, so its a case of tightening the belts until I can work again. Hope fully this will be within a month working from home to start with until I feel confident enough to go into the office in my chair through using access to work. Eventually going in full time under my own steam when am up and about properly but who knows when that will be ?
Also starting getting things in for my hospital bag, putting things away ready to pack. What kind of PJs do you get for an amputation? long legs are not going to work. Nightie? shorts? opted for one nightie and some PJ shorts. Hoping to take the laptop in with me and put some credit on a Dongle as well so I have access to the internet, don't want to pay for the service in the hospital.
Taking lots of books, puzzle books and DVDs in with me as well . Not forgetting the music! Also going to use this as an time to take back up my Spanish and Psychology studies.
So as you can see lots of things to sort out and do before hand as well as making time for the family, work and easter!
Still cracking on with the exercise but the not able to do the pilates as often as i would like. Still struggling with the weight,uurrggh!!
David is taking some more pics of my legs and stumps before I go in so looking forward to that. Hey at least I dont have to worry about having to get a pair of slippers ! I think the after care in the hospital is worrying me more then the operation itself which I know is strange but its from what I experienced before. Best advice i can give to any one who is going through something like this is plan as much before you go in as you can and talk to some one , especially if you feel that things are getting on top of you . Talking and planning these things will also help you to prepare mentally for the operation. Also dont worry getting down is going to happen, it wouldnt be normal if it didnt. Plan ahead for after the operation as well but unlike me try to be realistic about this, things will change as you recover and you cant predict what is going to happen or how quick !